Second Best {or Third or Fourth}

I am frustrated....and sad....and upset.

I pretty much now know where I stand with everyone in my life...and it doesn't look good. A lot of my relatives come around this area to visit friends or aunts, and yet, me being in the same town...have not/or maybe have once been to my house. I've been in my house for 7 years...oh, they always call and ask us to come visit...

But, never have I been so hurt as I was a couple weeks ago. My brother (yes, my only brother) came to Toronto, with his girlfriend, to see a concert...they were to be staying with the girlfriend's brother and his girlfriend. He was going to be 2 hours away for 4 days, and nothing was said, asked or planned for us to see each other. Not even a mention on being so close he would love to see his niece (yes, his only neice). I was upset...but as usual, I don't say anything, cause that's what I do...I keep all my feelings quiet so as not to upset people. Well, while he was here, he did contact me and made mention of us getting together...he was really super busy, but could maybe squeeze us in for an hour or two at the beach the next day. Great!! I would love to see my brother again, and K would love to see her uncle. The problem was he contacted me through facebook and didn't leave a #...so i had to respond through facebook...except he didn't check back to see what i had answered until the next day when it was too late for us to leave for toronto...I was soooo upset!! All I could do is cry. Seriously, ask my husband (who probably thinks I'm a nutcase), or ask my mom, who happened to call just after I stopped crying to my husband, and as soon as I heard her voice, I started to cry again. To feel unloved, unwanted is the worst feeling in the world. Thank goodness I didn't mention to my daughter that we were going to see him...and I only did that so i didn't have to hear "are we leaving yet" or "how much longer till we leave to see Unkee R"??

Here's a question: If you only had one sister and one niece and you were going to be 2 hours away, would you not take a day out of the four days to go spend the day with them?? I would think so, but, I didn't even expect that from them...we had cancelled our plans once we got the invitation from my brother, so that we could drive 2 hours to spend an hour or 2 with him and his girlfriend (along with her brother and girlfriend), and then drive 2 hours back. Shit, when i went home for a visit in may, if my brother couldn't make it home for a visit, i was going to drive (with my VERY talkative 4-year-old) 6 hours + a boat ride to visit with him. I would never think of being that close and not visiting with my only brother.

He and I were not always close, and still aren't the closest, but over the last few years, I feel that we have become closer. I feel like we can have a good time together. But I guess this goes to show, it was one-sided.

I get why they would want to spend most of their time with the girlfriends brother and his girlfriend. The are carefree, no responsibilities. Just like my brother and his girlfriend. But, one day?? a couple hours?? Why am I/are we just not good enough?? Last year, they were in ontario (mostly toronto) for a couple weeks...we got one day...and we appreciated it...but why out of 2 weeks or more do the girlfriends brother get 13 days and we get 1?? I know they did some travelling...but why couldn't they invite us? Why couldn't M and I have met them at wonderland?? or the 3 of us met them in niagara falls?? I just don't understand, and it hurts. Ok, yeah I don't/ can't go bar hoppin' all hours of the night, I am a mom first and fore-most...but I can be fun too!! How would you feel in the same situation?

The thing is, it has always been this way. We all went home one year for Christmas (K was 7 months old), and the girlfriends brother was home too. My brother would come spend time with us (and don't get me wrong, he does spend time with us when we are home), but then would leave after K would go to bed to go watch a movie with his girlfriend and her brother...could i not have gotten an invitation to watch a movie?? I know how to watch a movie!! Another time, they all (brother/girlfriend/girlfriend's brother/brother's girlfriend) went for a hike at gros morne...so my brother dropped over for a visit the night before cause they were going hiking the next day and would therefore not see us. When I am at home, thats the one time I always have a babysitter...I would have loved to hike gros morne. I will admit that i am a smoker and they are not...I will admit they are all in great shape, and I am not...but even if it had killed me, I would have kept up with them, and I would have loved it. How would you feel??

Now, I don't want to sound childish with these little incidents. But these are a few of the incidents that I've felt like I have been slapped in the face.

Anyways, all this happened about 3 weeks ago. I didn't know what I was going to do...all I gotta say is thank goodness he didn't call that night!!! What do you do?? He is the type of person that if you say something he doesn't want to hear, he shuts down. So, do i say what i want to say, he shut down and not talk to me anymore, or do i leave it (as i usually do) and just privately stew?? If i say something, and he does stop talking to me, that is my mom's biggest fear for us to be on the outs...but do i keep my mouth shut, and just keep being angry?? Hardest decision. I don't want to do anything to hurt my mom, but...

Anyways, he called tonight...and I do have to admit, when i saw the number on the phone, I contemplated not answering. But, I did answer and there was a bit of small talk and then an i'm sorry...which i appreciate that he took the effort to say, albeit 3 weeks later...and my response...I had to say something, but I tried really hard not to say it angrily. I explained how hurt I was, for me, but mostly for my 4 year old daughter who adores him, and doesn't understand now, but in a few years will understand that her uncle is 2 hours aways and is too "busy" to see her. She won't understand why...just as I can't. He didn't really want to hear it, he shut down and really didn't say too much, so for my mom, I left it at that, I didn't say everything that I wanted, and said we will drop it. And, then went on to say a few things else to try to have a little bit of normal conversation, talking about signing K up in dance and swim lessons, talking about how K is going to be starting school in 3 weeks...not really any response from him....went on to talk about how brave she was in trying to ride a bike with no training wheels, about her getting her ears checked soon to see if her tubes are out...finally he says something, "So how is K liking school so far"?? Seriously??? Why did you even call?? i just finished saying she was starting school in 3 weeks...its still august...

I don't know where this will leave us....

As I write this at the wee hour of 5 a.m. cause I cannot sleep because I am still frustrated, still sad, still upset... I still shed tears as I think about it.

He is my only brother...and I do love him...but do i keep settling for second best?? do I let my daughter grow up always feeling like second best?? Will I enjoy their visit if they do decide to make more effort next time?? or will it just feel like they are only here because I kicked up a fuss? I guess only time will tell...And I hope it works out....but I just knew, that even for my mom, I could not completely keep my mouth shut.....again....

{New} Life

There is nothing in the world like the feeling of holding a brand new baby....feeling their delicate skin, inhaling their smell and admiring their beauty...



A good friend of mine had a new baby on March 21, 2010...the above pic is of me with new baby Breanne @ 24 hours old...

I also had the pleasure of taking some pics of the little lady @ 4 days old. I LOVE taking pics....I love playing around with them too...but don't always find a lot of time for it. But, with some simple editing, here are a few of my favorites...



Maybe I should have another one ..... nah!!! I'll just enjoy other people's babies.

"Your Daughter’s Mother and Your Mother’s Daughter”

I read this somewhere today and loved it...I don't remember where I read it...but it is written so truthfully...

We come thru them. We bond. We attach. We connect. In our rocky adolescence we fight against their old-fashioned and outdated beliefs. We differentiate and separate. We resent them for who they are..and always love them for being exactly that. We dream of becoming just like them..and fear that that’s exactly who we’ve become. Once we were daughters only. Now we are mothers to those daughters we once were.

As our mothers’ daughters we were raised to be seen and not heard. As our daughters’ mothers we are – perhaps – to be heard, but rarely to be seen. Not with them in their lives. Not in public for certain. After a lifetime of being the drivers of their cars, we find ourselves relegated to the back seat. We learn to speak only when spoken to, and offer our sage advice only when asked. We learn to tread softly, to wear beige, to blend into the backgrounds of our daughters’ days.

We find ourselves, surprisingly and unexpectedly, slipping and sliding into our mother’s well-worn shoes. We begin to see and understand from the other side.

Perfecting/Playing with Pics

“You can become blind by seeing each day as a similar one.

Each day is a different one, each day brings a miracle of its own.

It’s just a matter of paying attention to this miracle.”

-Paula Coelho

I've been sitting here tonight semi-watching olympics/cartoons (yes, K is still up and wanting to watch a show or two of hers--although she did enjoy some of the figure-skating), listening to K talk/play with her toys, and watching hubby chat online/play games at the other end of the couch. And though it is all normal activity, as I sit here, I think how lucky I really am. And as I am thinking how lucky I am, and listening the the regular noise that is...I also have been playing with/editing some pics. I actually haven't had my camera out as much as usual for the last little while...winter blues, perhaps?? Probably not, as I LOVE winter!! I'm not sure why, but i do have a few fav pics to share that have been taken lately. K is just the cutest and as many pics I have of her, I just can't resist taking more. And the town I live in...although I've been living here for almost 10 years now, I still love the absolute beauty of it!!

Isn't K a beauty??

A Girl in her Wedding Dress

We are in the process of clearing out our spare room to renovate into a new "big girl" room for K. We are finding lots of treasures that just got poked in the closets in there over the last 7 years. As K and I were working on it one day we came across a bag that had my Grade 12 graduation dress in it, along with my flower girl dress I wore at my Aunt's wedding when I was 5 or 6. Of course, K being K, HAD to put it on right away. She wore that dress all day...and just kept saying over and over again that she was in her wedding dress...and was so proud to wear a dress that was her momma's dress when she was little. It was the cutest thing...although the dress is a little too big for her yet...

My Little Ballerina

Dance is the hidden language of the soul. --*Martha Graham*




I recently had K pics taken in her little dance tutu....and they turned out adorable!! I am so impressed with this photographer...although she took a lot of close-up pics that you couldn't actually see the tutu. But honestly, even the close-ups were awesome...just had to share some of these pics.

Our Newest Addition...

A little girl in love...




We got turned onto Waldorf dolls from a friend of mine. And while I am not a person who necessarily will go for the "all natural" product...it doesn't hurt. They are very cute...and K really seems to prefer the "softer" dolls much more than the hard plastic dolls.


The only problem with these dolls is that they are flippin' expensive!! It just so happened that the friend that turned me on to these dolls has a very talented sister-in-law who had decided to try to make a few of these dolls. The first five people to let her know got a doll made for free...you just had to buy the materials. I was so in!! And, so, the first doll was underway...a little cutie with blond hair and blue eyes just like K.


Not too long after the first doll was underway, I saw a notification on the side of my facebook that my friend had commented on a pic in a group called "Bamboletta". In checking out the group, I somehow got on her website and entered my name into a drawing for a Waldorf doll by the home-operated company. And to my great surprise, I won!! The doll I won, I let K get her in the mail and bring her home and open her who became named Emmy. The one that was being made (what an awesome woman for doing that, as these dolls sell for over $100 each...usually around $130-160), K opened Christmas morning from Santa Claus. She later became known as Annaleise.


Now, I was looking around on Etsy a few weeks ago, K laying on my side, late at night. I thought she was sleeping...but found out she wasn't as I opened a window with the cutest little doll with dark hair, dark skin and dark eyes...K fell in love. I wouldn't spend the money for her. But, K kept asking and kept saying how much she loved her, and how much her "girls" needed a new friend. In thinking about it, K had a bunch of money in her banks plus some she had gotten for Christmas. So, I explained to her, if she really wanted to have that doll, she had to buy it with her own money...if she had enough. Well, it turned out she did have enough money and was more than happy to pay for her own doll.


She was sooo proud that she paid for it herself. Then was the hard part....waiting for it to come in the mail. Well, yesterday, she arrived!! The newest family member. And, after much deliberation on K's part, she became "Melody" cause she has a red dress (just like Melody on her movie). lol....the reasoning of a 3 year old!! Anyways, K is just in her glory with the new arrival...She is actually asleep upstairs snuggling all three right now (although she is showing a little more preference for Melody right now over the other two).

Here is a pic of K watching tv with her girls!!

My Perfect Family!

To us, family means putting your arms around each other and being there.
– Barbara Bush


My family is my life. Simple statement...simply said...but embraces all my feelings for my family. My daughter is definately the entertainer in the family...keeps us laughing, and keeps us on our toes. My little princess. My little kindred spirit. The one who loves to have movie night with her mommy and daddy, loves the colour pink, adores fairy tales and happy endings and has a spirit that is so very, very sensitive (which can also means lots of tears!)… she is gentle and kind to her sister (our dog)---Kuma (for the most part!) … between growing up and becoming such a great helper for mommy, she’s still such a sweet little girl who just wants to dance with her daddy when he gets home from work and snuggle up with her mommy late at night. I cannot imagine my life without her and I honestly do feel so blessed to call her my own.





My husband, of whom I have talked about in an earlier post. My best friend, my Man, my Confidante, my Sweetheart (although he doesn't like people to know) who is up for anything, and if he isn't, I can usually convince him!! He loves to tease, which gets our daughter going, and pick and poke whenever he gets a chance...and he LOVES the reactions of the recipient of his teasing. I feel so lucky and honored to have him as a part of my life.

My Mom and Dad. Always there, even though we are so far away from each other. Always know I can depend on them and go to them with anything. Will they judge?? maybe...but they will always do what they can to help. And they are also head over heals in love with K (not that any grandparent don't love their grandbaby). The don't get to see her very often, but when they do...I love to just sit back and watch them with her. Interaction between them always makes me smile, cause you can always see the love between them. I hope I can grow to be 1/2 the parent they are, and I will be successful in my job as a parent.

My brother. Although I don't see him very often, or talk to him very often...I still love him to pieces. He is freakin' hilarious...can always make me laugh...and we have a great time together when we see each other. Again with him, as with my parents, I love to watch the interaction between him and K. Amazing to watch!! Especially considering he doesn't want kids... And, I know, no matter what, he would do whatever he could for me if I needed him.

My in-laws are awesome as well. My mother in law, and father in law are really great people. As with my parents...we always know we can depend on them. My sister in law....hmmmm...she's a different story...haha...just joking. I love her too, but a lot of our relationship is teasing and being jokingly mean and rude to each other.

So many people have no family...I am very blessed in my life.

You Wanna Go-Me Homey???

My husband M can get my daughter all riled up like no other. The other night they just cracked me up. K was tugging at M and singing and repeatedly "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy"....so he turned around and with a home-boy accent says " You wanna go-me homey, you wanna piece of me"??? She in turns starts yelling, "You wanna Moe-me Moe-me, you wanna piece of chicken"?? We both laughed so hard...so she says again, "You wanna Moe-me Moe-me, you wanna piece of spaghetti"?? haha...K seriously keeps me entertained....All The Time. And M likes to help out the situation.

My Wonderful Hubby!!

“Sometimes in life, you find a special friend. Someone who changes your life just by being part of it.
Someone who makes you laugh until you can’t stop.
Someone who makes you believe that there really is good in the world.
Someone who convinces you that there really is an unlocked door just waiting for you to open it.
This is forever friendship. Your forever friend gets you through the hard times, the sad times and the confused times.
And if you find such a friend, you feel happy and complete because you need not worry.
You have a forever friend, and forever has no end. ”







That person for me is my husband. We've been together since 1997...that'll be 13 years in May...Holy Crap!! A lot of people think we have the perfect relationship...We totally don't. And, to be honest, we haven't always gotten along, but we are not ones to just give up on a relationship because of a few arguments. We both enjoy a good argument...but some have been doozies. Don't get me wrong...its gotten pretty bad between us sometimes, but things like that happen in many relationships. Through the good times and the bad, though, he has ALWAYS been there for me...even though sometimes I tried to push him away. And, no matter whats going on, or how upset I am...he can ALWAYS make me laugh...even if I don't want him to. I just wanted to do a shout-out to my wonderful/awesome husband...I love you babe!!! And I hope and wish for all the women out there to get a great guy, just like me. Muah!!!

Walking in a Winter Wonderland

“…Jack Frost took his paintbrush
as he sailed across the sky
so every morning as the sun comes up
his artwork greets the eye …

… so when you’re in bed sleeping
and outside everything seems faint
just remember at midnight
Jack Frost begins to paint…”





What gorgeous Winter days. Yesterday and today. Mild temperatures as far as Winter goes...and just gorgeous...the trees with a light "frosting" of ice...everything glistening...I love Winter...can u tell?? Anyways, it was such a gorgeous day yesterday that K and I headed out for a leisurely walk just after we got home (me from work, K from daycare).

K was being a ham as soon as the camera came out...





And the scenery was freaking gorgeous <3





Here is my favorite pic of K from our walk yesterday:





Where there's a puddle, there's a child jumping in it ...and loving it...





...and to end this "post of pics", one more pic of this gorgeous Winter day walk with my favorite
girl ...




...now if only we could just get a little more snow...it would be just perfect <3 <3 <3

Kreations!!!

I love to spend time doing things with my daughter...and she loves to create!! Anything and everything...she loves baking, cutting, gluing, painting, stickers...you name it...so the last few days, I got to spend some extra quality time with K, and K got to do what she loves best...creating.




First we made muffins...chocolate chip for daddy, strawberry yogurt for mommy, and K eats a little of both...lol. Next we moved on to make salt dough necklaces...let me tell you...this is the first time I had ever used or experimented with salt dough...what a heck of a mess!! and K loved every minute of it...except the wait for the cut-outs to cook and cool down enough for her to paint...but she was very pleased with the final product. And then, since the paints were out anyways, she decided to paint a picture with a rainbow, K and her best friend ML, a jelly fish, a heart, whatever her heart desired at the time...my little creator is very imaginative...and had the time of her life creating. She much prefers to be given the tools and told to go to, than to be told how to do something...and I try to encourage her individualism...(is that even a word??, anyways, you get my point). Oh and we made 4 batches of play doh last week that she had the time of her life creating...making "snowmen" and "crabby patties" and "flowers" and "butterflies"....now just remains...what to create next???

Gorgeous Girlz with their Girlz!!!

"Lean on me, when you're not strong, and I'll be your friend, I'll help you carry on, for it won't be long, 'til I'm going to need somebody to lean on."




The above pic is of my daughter K (left) and best friend "ML" and their babies!!!


Now, I have to say, I have the BEST child care provider for my daughter I could possible ask for!! When I went back to work 2 days before K's first birthday, I was devastated to be leaving my daughter with a virtual stranger. Being not from these parts, I didn't know anyone who did childcare, so I did the dreaded (gasp) newspaper search. There was only one from that search that I was even interested in meeting. Bonus for me (and K), it turned out she was a Brownie leader that a friend of mine knew. So, if nothing else, she would have first aid, etc. But boy, did I get more than I bargained for. First of all, K liked it sooo much there, even from the very first day, that I have never had a problem dropping her off...more of a problem some days trying to convince her to come home with me...lol. "A", her childcare provider also has a daughter about 3 months older than K...so that was great. Apparently they hit it off right away, and have been best friends ever since. It was the hardest thing leaving my daughter for someone else to care for for 8 hours a day or more, but A was awesome!! She added me to her facebook, and would randomly post pics of both the girls playing or some of just K by herself. It was easy to tell K was having a great time there by the smiles she had in all the pics A posted. This helped me sooo much with the transition of going back to work, and with not being with my daughter 24/7. She would also do K's hair, and if/when K would leak through a diaper or mess her clothes in some way, I can't even tell you how many times she would wash up her clothes. She also did the potty training thing along with me. Couldn't have done it without her!! I hold her in the highest regard for sure. And now, I can even say she is a friend. We started to get the girls together outside her place this past spring and spent lots of time at the parks. A spiratically comes over for an evening of hottubbin'. We usually plan for an hour or two...but by the time we come in, it is usually about 5 hours...haha. The girls did a couple sessions of swimming lessons together this summer (which A offered and took them to cause I was working---see what I mean?? She's awesome!!). And, they are now in the same dance class!! I am so glad K has such a good friend that she thinks so much of at such a young age. She will just randomly say "ML's my best friend and I love her very much"!!!

Beautiful Ballerina....

Daughters Dance their Way into Your Heart
Whirling on the Tips of Angel Wings;
Scattering Kisses & Gold Dust in our Paths


My daughter K LOVES to dance. Ever since she could move she would bop her head or body to music everytime it was on...even if it was a commercial...or the weather channel...lol. So, when she was 2, I enrolled her in dance class. The dance class in town don't take kids till they are 3 so we made the drive to the next town for a "Mommy and Me" class...No trouble to tell she is the love of Mommy's life-cause I don't dance for just anyone. But when this year rolled around, there was no question that she was going to the dance class in our town. Not only no driving for Mommy, but two of her best friends are going to this dance class as well. And staying true to her love of dancing, she looks forward to each and every class!! I am so glad she has found something she loves so thoroughly. I hope she sticks with it!!

Here is a pic of my Beautiful Ballerina....

~~~Family~~~

Other things may change us, but we start and end with the family.
– Anthony Brandt




I moved away from home in 2000...a few months before my 20th birthday. I was excited for new adventure and it was a move that needed to take place. However, there is not a day that goes by that I don't miss my family like crazy. My husband and I had been together 3 years when we moved away from all our family that we have known. Long story short we settled in a small town 2570 kilometers from what we call "home". It was and will always be home to me...however the town we live in now is home as well. And, its not that we don't have family here...its just family I don't really know. My dad's sisters have been there for me/us since we have moved here, but when I first moved here, I only knew these "family members" from a 2 week visit every second year my whole life. That being said, they have grown to be a lot more.

We have managed to get in a few visits throughout the years, including going "home" for our wedding in 2004. Our parents have made a few visits as well. In 2006, when our precious daughter was born, we have seen our parents more than before as K is the first grandchild on both my side of the family and M's side of the family...a very spoiled and VERY loved little girl!! And since K has been born I have even seen my brother here twice (just short visits, but still), and M's sister here once.

I didn't have the whole "homesick" feeling before K was born...Not that I didn't miss everyone, but I didn't feel like I "needed" to move back. Once K was born it was a different story for me. I HATE that she has to grow up sooo far away from not only one, but both sets of grandparents, and her aunt and uncle...plus tonnes and tonnes of other family. I think its because I grew up across the field from one set of grandparents and a 10 minute walk from the other set. I had sleepovers, and played with them and visited with them almost every day. But through the invention of the new (not so new now) technology, K knows her grandparents even when she hasn't seen them in a while...and she always has. Video messages has been awesome for both K and the grandparents...and the added bonus of Facebook lets me share pics with all the family so they can see her growing up.

We had a visit from M's mom in October, and my parents came for Christmas this year!! I was sooo excited...as was K. They just left to go home 2 days ago and I miss them already. Now I have to decide when our trip will be for the year.

I will leave you with a pic of my parents and K during their Christmas trip. This is a pic of them on a horse and wagon ride to look @ all the Christmas lights.

{2010}

Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right. ~Oprah Winfrey

Wow!! I can't believe its 2010 already!! I cannot wait to see what this year has in store...The last year was overall awesome. I love watching my dear daughter "K" getting bigger, growing up and constantly learning. Spending time with hubby has been great too...We seem to be able to argue less and enjoy each others company more as we are getting older. Christmas was A.W.E.S.O.M.E. K is at the perfect age...she had all the excitement that should come with Christmas.

However, the end of the year could have been better!! December was a super busy month for me (as well as everyone else I'm sure). My parents were coming on December 17 for the Christmas holidays...the second Christmas in 10 that we have spent together. So, as I am cleaning up shop and organizing and getting ready for their arrival (which I am a procrastinator, so everything was done in the last few days), there was a little glitch. On my way home from work on December 14, a perfectly fine day-no snow on the roads, sun was shining-I was thinking of picking up "K" and going for a little walk with her when we got home, when some guy decides to run a stop sign. My first accident. Needless to say, dealing with police, insurance companies, and garages took up a LOT of time. They were thinking of writing the van off, but in the end, the van was worth more than they had first anticipated. So, $4900 damage later and almost 3 weeks later....I am still waiting for my van....

I also had a birthday recently. The big 2-9. haha...only one year away from dirty thirty, which I was dreading...but it turns out 29 sucks!! I had a regular appointment for a physical scheduled...an obligation more than anything else, cause I've never had a health issue in my life. So, imagine my surprise when I show Doc my hand (which randomly breaks out into blisters), and she decided to do a biopsy on it later that day, she found out I have a heart murmur that I have to get tests done to check on it, and...in my sample provided, my white blood count is low and some blood in my urine. I have to drop off another sample next week. I went back for my biopsy that day...and when it was almost over...I made the mistake of looking over just as she was pulling out part of my hand and the blood started flowing. Long story short...I had to stay for an extra 20 minutes with my feet up and a cold cloth on my head.

Anyways, enough complaining for now!! Cheers to 2010!! May it bring me back my van, my health, and be full of greatness all the way around!!

*posting a pic of me with my favorite present for Christmas!! My Newfoundland quilt!! Thanks Mom and Dad!!

I've given in...

I have been considering creating a blog for some time now...and kept putting it off due to so many other things going on, I am not sure I can keep up a regular blogging process. But I have finally decided to start one anyways...and we'll see how it goes. I am a 29 year old mother of one and loving it...she is the single, most wonderful thing that has EVER happened to me. My gorgeous daughter "K" (a mother's biased opinion, I know) is 3...I am married to, and still in love with (most of the time), my wonderful husband "M" since 2004 (we've been together since 1997). Anyways, that is my quick introduction, and I will be back to post/blog some more...and hopefully be a faithful blogger and be able to keep up with it!!